Diane Trout (alienghic) wrote,
Diane Trout


I managed to get invited to a large libra birthday party for a bunch of women, including people like sapience helensmind79 (stacyjill managed to beam in via ichat), there was also ladyfrancesca who I met once before, and she managed to recognize me. (Pretty much if someone changes anything about them I can't recognize them, Yep dying your hair is enough to make me go, huh, that person looks vaguely familiar.)

I think there are more LJ users but I don't know them (Though I suppose if I go trolling through peoples friends lists I might find them).

I felt out of place and didn't really know how to participate, and yet, when I left there were so many people I wanted to say good-bye to. I usually have little idea to say at large parties, one of my longest conversations was listening to one acquaintance who was going through chemotherapy. Yet I'm glad I went and saw everyone.

There's this awkward phase for people who are on the cusp between acquaintances and friends that's really hard to deal with. The only way that I know of how to deal with it is to try to power through it and continue spending time with them by trying to learn about what more personal thoughts are shareable.

After I wondered if I'd do better around people if I stopped filling my head with tales of how the world is ending with something a bit more pleasant.

(And now for some free association, since memories and thoughts are maintained by repetition, I've wondered if reading depressing news makes me more likely to obsess about various apocalypses as the negative information reinforces the brain chemistry that creates my negative outlook. This is one reason why I'm trying to force myself to read stories about constructing more positive futures.)
Tags: friends, social

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