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The Revenge of the Cute Coworker

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Jun. 9th, 2003 | 08:19 pm

So today the cute, funny, entertaining, interesting and stimulating coworker I had been obsessing about sent me a terrifying email. She told me that she has a long letter she's been meaning to write me but hasn't. So nervously I wondered what does she might want to tell me, had I weirded her out too much by being interested in her?

So I did the first thing that came to mind, I went and teased her about the angst of being left hanging after reading such an email. As a bit of foreshadowing that I missed, she blushed when she said she'd send it today.

In the letter which I received shortly thereafter she wished that it to were longer and more eloquent. It did, however, cover the salient points--she thinks I'm really cool, really enjoys spending time with me and wants to spend more time with me. But, she doesn't want to have sex.

What? I blinked, looked back, and the pixels still told the same story, not interested in sex with women.

Why would she say such a thing? How does one answer such a statement?

I was bewildered for a bit and then told her how her comment strongly reminded me of the movie Kissing Jessica Stein. I also mentioned the idea of romantic friendship that I learned about in Surpassing the love of men: Romantic Friendship and Love Between Women from the Renaissance to the Present.

After that I went into her office and we both had a rather awkward chat. Then we went out to dinner, picking up another coworker on the way.

Although still confused and wondering what this might mean, I did realize one thing, I was right--she had been exhibiting some mixed signals.

There is a part of me that wants to try arguing for her to consider being bi, even though most of the arguments that I might try on her I'd have to apply to me as well (stupid self-consistency).

Also while writing this I started wondering if I should've offered her a hug good night when we parted ways at her car.

The last thing was to wonder what I should actually do with this information, I suspect nothing, other than continue being friendly. If need be we can renegotiate things later (though since I tend not to like pushing people's boundaries she might have to drop some hints if she wants to renegotiate).

Though a side effect is perhaps I wont completely lose the mild crush.

I wonder if I should introduce her to some of my bi women friends and they can talk about their experiences discovering they were bi.

And to break the 4th wall of LJ, if she's interested in talking to someone else who might've gone through a similar situation perhaps she can post here and one of my dear readers might offer some comments.

Alsi I suspect there's a good chance she'll get first post on this entry. Ah the exhibitionism of LJ.

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Comments {8}

Diane Trout

(no subject)

from: alienghic
date: Jun. 10th, 2003 10:42 am (UTC)

Of the people I know I seem to be the least interested in sex. Some of it may be that there have usually been other torments attached to my attempts at sex, and so I just haven't had a chance to feel comfortable with sex with someone I trust.

On the other hand I may actually just not find it as compelling as most people.

Which is why I told her about the whole romantic friendship concept.

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