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Cute Queer Girl

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Nov. 5th, 2003 | 01:50 am
mood: nervousnervous

I managed to talk some with the cute girl from lesbian chat.

She was happy to learn that I'm vegetarian and knew of things like la.indymedia.org. (Though I was slightly evil in mentioning that, as when I did my web search on her I found that she was referred to in a couple of articles there. )

However I learned that she's attracted to butch women.

Though she then qualified it as saying long hair was ok, that her definition of "butch" was more something about being "separated", with "a wall", and "less emotionally fluid".

I mentioned a fund raiser she was advertising earlier in the evening, and by the end she invited me and even offered to carpool.

Though interacting with her for a bit does lead me to wonder if she as any critical thinking neurons. She seems to rapidly experience feelings with little time for analysis. I wonder how much dating someone like that might annoy me.

Though one of the things that helped me get over my last girlfriend was an incompatibility in politics, here there may be an incompatibility in intellectual stimulation. I wonder which might be more important to me. (Or do I just want it all).

Also I wonder what life would be like if I only experienced it once, instead of over and over again?

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Comments {7}

soulspirals

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from: soulspirals
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 06:38 am (UTC)
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I found that for me, incompatability in intellect is a make-or-break factor for a long-term relationship. Not all dating relationships are/need to be long-term.

Incompatibility in politics is substantial for me as well. If we don't agree on the big picture issues, then we likely don't share values. Shared values are extremely important to me. Sharing the big picture and differing over details or approaches doesn't bother me so much. Especially if there is genuine respect for each other.

My husband and I don't always vote for the same political candidates.

My girlfriend is an all organic vegetarian. I'm neither. But I'm happy to cook for her according to her dietary preferences.

I'm a witch, my girlfriend is something closer to Christian. That hasn't even caused us any real problems - only one that we're still negotiating. She feels that we can't spend any holidays together anymore because I don't share her beliefs. I told her that it's not a problem for me to spend time with her during her holidays, so that's her baggage to talk through and deal with. She also asked if she could come visit and spend Solstice with me. So we're doing pretty OK.

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Diane Trout

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from: alienghic
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 11:13 am (UTC)
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I agree with your perspective on intellect and shared values. Both having shared values and a similiar intellectual capabilities both help with being understood. Some of my frustration with my family is how different our world views are. Since there's virtually no overlap in how we view the world, it's really difficult to find anything to talk about.

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Bolowolf

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from: bolowolf
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 09:49 am (UTC)
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I've thought from time to time about what it would be like to date someone who is not intellectually stimulating to me. I fear one of two things would happen...I would either play mind games with the person or I would go off on a huge ranting and raving tangent some day and then end the relationship. But I'm weird and sometimes rude.

I guess to me the intellectual stimulation is more important than the same political views.
If the person can articulately argue why they support Newt Gingrich...then I can live with that because there's hope some day I can convince the person not to.

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Diane Trout

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from: alienghic
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 11:16 am (UTC)
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Currently what I'm hoping is that it's just that she's leading with her compassion and emotions, and that she's also intelligent. I have learned that she did graduate from ucsd. (Though I don't know in what yet.)

She's also started her own non-profit which I assume takes some mental acuity.

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secretslip

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from: secretslip
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 10:57 am (UTC)
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I only date people who are smarter than me.

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Diane Trout

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from: alienghic
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 11:14 am (UTC)
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If I had that rule I'd never date anyone.

I prefer having similiar intellectual prowess, it means no one has the upper hand in debates or arguments.

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Dieppe

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from: dieppe
date: Nov. 5th, 2003 07:42 pm (UTC)
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Pretty large dating pool, huh?





;)

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